Boundaries are without a doubt one of the greatest challenges for the people I see in my practice and they were a challenge for me until I was in my early 40s so I love exploring this topic and working with others to understand them and set them in place in their lives. Continue reading
Last week I shared with you 5 Key Ingredients You Must Have For A Satisfying Relationship That Lasts but there is one more ingredient that trumps all others in terms of keeping us on track and connected in a meaningful way.
This particular ingredient is especially useful for anyone who struggles in a committed, loving relationship, but it is also for those who might be struggling with their relationships with their children, their siblings, their neighbours or their co-workers. And it is even more useful when you don’t know what else to do. Continue reading
One of the things I see many of my clients struggling with is an inbuilt – and deeply ingrained – judgment system that leaves them feeling ripped off, powerless, frustrated and even angry at times, so I wanted to talk about how a simple shift in the way we judge the people and circumstances of our lives can relieve us of those all-consuming feelings of injustice and instead move us into a place where we have a whole set of choices we didn’t know we had before.
I met with a friend and colleague recently to discuss the idea of the two of us co-writing a book about raising resilient children. We’d worked together a couple of years ago delivering an 11-week course in resilience skills to 4 grades of teenage boys at a Flexi-School on the north side of Brisbane and we very quickly realised how like-minded we were in our approach to the program and in our understanding of emotional development.
As we explored the topics we wanted to cover and the philosophies and practices we wanted to include in our book, we both agreed that the most important thing any of us can probably do for ourselves, and possibly the only thing we have any real control over, is
to consciously raise our own vibration to such a degree that we literally vibrate above the drama in life.
Purpose gives meaning to life in a huge way and meaning gives depth to our experiences which is what makes our life rich and juicy.
Do you know what your purpose is?
I remember many years ago hearing a motivation speaker pointing out that de-sire can be broken down to mean ‘of God’ and I realised I’d had a program running that told me it was selfish to desire something because when I heard that it was like I’d been given permission to have my wants without any guilt or shame. It was a totally liberating experience to say the least.
To live a rich, juicy life, you have to listen to your heart and live from that place, so imagine the inner conflict and turmoil that exists if you are brought up to believe that you are selfish for wanting something for yourself?
Many women I know are programed in that way and they are conflicted on a daily basis. Continue reading
Have you ever been judged and ridiculed by someone who’s opinion you valued? Maybe it was a girlfriend, a family member or possibly even a significant other.
I shared an opinion during this week that one of my ‘friends’ decided needed correcting. This ‘friend’ assumed where I was coming from rather than asking me what I meant, and then she became my personal judge and jury. And she did it all in front of an audience of her peers.
Apparently my hypocrisy needed to be exposed. Well thank you very much for taking it upon yourself to do that for me but if I wanted you to do that I would have asked.
Ha ha ha. How arrogant can a person be?
Now I know that her opinion is a reflection of her and that it really has nothing to do with me, and honestly, she wasn’t a close friend. What happened though really got me thinking about the way in which we can spoil the relationships that do matter to us. Continue reading
Last week some of us celebrated Valentine’s Day, and while many of us were enjoying flowers and chocolates and other traditionally romantic gestures, we were blissfully unaware that an increased number of AVO and DVO breaches were taking place.
Now I don’t want to burst anyone’s bubble. I am all for celebrating love whenever and wherever possible and I myself am still enjoying the scent of the most beautiful bunch of flowers thanks to my thoughtful and loving husband, but knowing how crazy Valentine’s Day makes some people inspired me to want to write more about how we develop emotionally and explore what it might take to change what has become a culture of domestic violence.
I have had so much going on in my life of late and I have been doing a bit of travel which is always exciting and I love it, but it tends to take me out of my routine and out of my comfort zone which in turn can take me away from myself because I become so outward focused.
This then leads me to feeling disconnected, anxious and lonely and while it still amazes me that I can feel lonely when I am surrounded by lots of people, that is what happens.
So, as I take time out to reconnect with myself today, I am wondering how many other women are so busy in their lives that they feel disconnected, anxious and lonely.
How many have lost touch with who they are, what they really want and where they really want to go because they are still busily following the directions they – or life – set for them a long time ago. Perhaps even years or a lifetime ago.
So this blog is all about emotionally recalibrating. Just like a GPS when you take an unexpected turn, you can very quickly re-evaluate your position and get back on track so that the way you are living isn’t at the cost of your relationship with you. Continue reading
Today I want to talk about something I have been considering for quite a while and that is whether or not we establish an unconscious emotional set point in our childhood and whether or not we naturally return to that set point when as adults we forget to regularly do the things we know we must do in order to keep well and happy?
I am asking this for those who spend a lot of their time, sometimes successfully and sometimes unsuccessfully – trying to keep anxiety, depression or low self-esteem at bay, and especially for those who feel like they are constantly fighting to keep their head above water, emotionally speaking.
I am also asking this question for those who feel like they have Dr Jekyll and Mrs Hyde living in their bodies and don’t feel like they have a lot of control over who shows up from day to day. Continue reading
A rich, juicy life is not a perfect life. It’s a flawed life with a side of courage, determination and optimism. It has drama and it has losses but it also has successes. What makes it unique is you. You determine who you are going to be and how you are going to experience what life delivers to you.
I don’t know what challenges you might be facing right now but life likes to deliver a variety of challenges to us all. You might be going through a marriage breakup, you might have a defiant teen who seems determined to self-destruct, or you might be caring for someone who is terminally ill. You might even be dealing with all three of those things at once. Continue reading